Neil Cattigan’s Remarks at the March 2023 Award Presentation
Thank you very much Katherine for inviting us here today and presenting us with this Pink Concussions award. I apologise on Morven’s behalf that she cannot be here, Dublin holds some very special memories for us as a family and coming over here was just too hard and too soon. It is with the heaviest of hearts that I accept this on behalf of Siobhan because She is our daughter and we are her voice.
She fought to change the world for the better, to ensure women were listened to, treated equally to men. I wish I had an hour to talk about our beautiful daughter, my Teeny, her Mummas’ Pumpkin. How do you explain to people who never knew her how incredible she was, like trying to describe dazzling colours to someone who has never seen?
Siobhan was our World, always has been, always will be. Her brother, her family, her partner, friends, colleagues, teammates, her community adored her, almost worshipped you could say.
Siobhan was so full of life; she comes from a huge extended family who doted on her. She enamoured those who met her with her captivating smile, her funny little chuckle, her ocean blue eyes that characterised her kind heart and beautiful, pure soul, no-one could compete with her loving cuddles. Her brother called her an Angel on Earth. She was adventurous, she sky-dived, river rafted, canyoned, she dived the great barrier reef, drove Route 66, swam with whale sharks. Her dancing hips were legendary, her laugh was contagious, her banter as we call it in Scotland made her a joy to be around, she was witty - in short - she loved life. Siobhan epitomised kindness, compassion, selflessness, she was a safety blanket to all and to know her really was to love her and she was loved by all.
At Stirling University, she was awarded a Degree in Sociology and Criminology and a Masters in Sports Psychology. She was hugely intelligent. She turned the losing Stirling Uni rugby team into a victorious side, being made captain and winning the league undefeated. She stood up for those with no voices, animals, the meek, the shy, the underdogs of society. She was astute and could call a liar out at a hundred yards. She was everyone’s champion. She was everyone’s hero. I’m sorry, I could go on forever but suffice it to say Siobhan was our oxygen and we’re simply existing in a state of paralysis until we meet again.
How did it come to where we are? That’s the question we can’t answer. Those beautiful, twinkling eyes lost their sparkle. They were empty, hiding a catastrophic illness behind a myriad of closed doors. No-one helped to open those doors. Her mesmerising smile disappeared, hugs and empathy trapped internally like a prisoner gagged, tied and bound. She became someone we didn’t recognise; someone Siobhan didn’t recognise.
We reached out to multiple health professionals from Siobhan’s own Scottish rugby doctor to every NHS medic, repeatedly telling them something catastrophic had happened in Siobhan’s brain and she was crumbling before our eyes. She was terrified, traumatised, she recognised the change in her personality. She didn’t know why, neither did we. She became a stranger, where was our beautiful girl, who was this person who acted like someone afflicted by Alzheimer’s?
Like eruptions gradually growing and building on the ocean floor, out of sight, her brain eventually succumbed when the Tsunami hit. No-one pressed the panic button.
It has been documented that Siobhan suffered two major traumatic brain injuries (that’s what I’m calling them because that’s what they are) however, there were several more and who knows how many more sub-concussive injuries Siobhan suffered. I don’t have time to explain all these, nor to explain how Siobhan’s versatility as a player, playing multiple positions and taking on the associated workload but those made significant contribution to her damaged brain becoming overwhelmed. I will let those more knowledgeable and articulate than me describe what changes need to be made.
What we do know though, is that changes need to be made now and not in ten years’ time. Siobhan would want to safeguard the future of both female and male athletes by increasing awareness, education and risk management of brain injuries. By dedicating research into female specific concussion protocols, rehabilitation, the tools needed for players, coaches, parents, partners to spot the changes before it’s too late.
Those with the power to do so need to come out of hiding, Stop denying the potential danger. Stop downplaying the differences in males and females. Lives are at risk; you can’t just wait and see. Money needs to be invested, science needs to be followed, players need to be protected. Within Siobhan’s elite playing squad, many positive changes were made after Siobhan passed away, both from a welfare and medical point of view. This should ensure no-one will have to suffer the Hell Siobhan did. There are people who will have to ask themselves the question - Could I have done more? Should I have done more? I’ll let their own consciences be the judge.
We firmly believe that all women need to be treated as worthy of research, specialist medics, facilities, monitoring and welfare. Basically treated as men are. Our belief is that the HIA, return to play and concussion protocols are unfit for purpose and in our experience, they need entirely overhauled.
If Siobhan had been male, if Siobhan had been referred to Birmingham and had access to the world-leading trauma neurosurgeon and state of the art neurological equipment, If Scottish rugby’s Chief Medical Officer had not left her to the mercy of an underfunded and understaffed NHS, Siobhan would be with us. There is not a shadow of a doubt in our minds about that. They didn’t. The SRU took her into private care, fixed her broken bones, assessed, scanned and treated her privately but when her brain was broken, they quite literally looked the other way. She was refused private medical care, despite our desperate pleas.
If every medic we approached had not simply played ‘followed the leader’ and ticked the same box as the one before, if just one had looked at the bigger picture, just one had asked a question not unfeasible to ask an athlete – have you suffered any brain injuries? Not one. Not one of the GPs who had known Siobhan from being a young child, not one thereafter. Not one actually sat down, asked relevant questions, looked into her eyes and at least make an effort to slot the jigsaw pieces together. Not one. This needs to change. Medical professionals need to be educated about brain injury in sport.
We will forevermore carry the guilt and the pain of being ignorant to the seriousness of traumatic brain injuries. We were unaware Siobhan’s symptoms were indicative of serious neurological damage. We had never heard of 2nd impact syndrome, post-concussion syndrome, CTE, women being more at risk – yes at risk – than men. Why not? We’re a rugby family. I’ve coached rugby for 20 years. I’ve played for 20 years. Could it be that by World Rugby and the Unions suppressing this knowledge means it’s been able to be kept a dirty secret until my daughter’s life was sacrificed? Siobhan had never been made aware either, she was as much in the dark as we were. That is unforgivable, World Rugby and the Unions have a duty of care, their welfare towards Siobhan was non-existent.
Three weeks after Siobhan’s passing, my brother-in-law read about female athletes with similar symptoms, the light came on, he recognised Siobhan in what he read. He passed the information to us then we too could see the undisputable, tragic parallels. This was Siobhan staring me in the face. This was what she was suffering from, the gradual changes, the symptoms, innocuous we thought, then finally the devastating alternation to her personality, it was then and only then that we realised what our baby had been suffering from all that time. That was 3 weeks after we lost Siobhan.
If listening to this tiny little excerpt of Siobhan’s story has ignited a determination into any one of you, or all, to make sure Siobhan’s story is not repeated and changes be implemented, then I thank you from the bottom of my heart and coming over here, despite the excruciating pain, will been worth it.
Siobhan Elizabeth Cattigan, please keep saying her name and she will live on forever. Thank you.